I'm giving Dave a break from the blog, and thought I'd write a few thoughts myself. Hope this finds you all healthy and happy and enjoying this indian summer!
What a time of change. The leaves are changing color, the tempature can't decide if it's summer or fall, the grass is growing like crazy, and everyday my son changes.
My son. What an amazing thing it is to be a mom. I listened to my own mother say that she loves me unconditionally my entire life, but it wasn't until I had Quinn, that I actually heard her. I totally get it.
Speaking of mom's...mine came up to take care of me the week following Quinn's birth, and honestly...I don't know what I would have done without her. I didn't/don't want everyone to take Quinn from my arms, that's not what's helpful...it's the stuff I can't do while he is IN my arms that is helpful. That's exactly what she did. For a week straight, she brought me tea, walked our dog, filled my water glass, changed and rocked Quinn when I needed to shower, cooked all my meals, shared my laughter in the good days and held my hand as I cried on the hard ones.. Who knew that BECOMING a mom, would make you need yours more than ever? Thank you mom.. I love you and I understand you more than I ever have.
Life with Quinn is starting to feel more managable. I pride myself on being a pretty strong girl. After having a baby, I was/am as fragile as blown glass. That said, I am learning to manage it better, and I find so much more joy in the little things each day. Every day gets a little easier, and we are starting to find our groove around here. Either that, or I'm just so tired that I'm in a fog, and everything feels a little out of body. haha...it's probably both. We spend most of our days inside, feeding and playing and sleeping. (him not me) I'm still really sore, and I've had a little trouble healing the "inside", so I'm supposed to limit my walking to 20 mins a day and no hills...well, if you know where I live, there are hills in every direction from my driveway. I cheat a little, but mostly I'll be hanging out at home for a few more weeks. My two best friends are coming tomorrow to help, and I am so excited to have them here. Again, they are the type to help with the unglamorous stuff and give me more time to bond with my baby. I love my girls, and my friends have been incredible.
Frank has been amazing. We were never worried about him, but more so..would I still be able to be a good mom to him as well... It's all working out. He has become SO watchful over Quinn. If someone takes Quinn out of the room that Frank is in, he follows. If Quinn is on a bouncy on the floor, he sits or lays next to him. It's been so endearing to watch. I'm so grateful for Frank, and I definitely have enough love for everyone. Dave takes him for walks everyday and we give him as much attention as we can.
Dave is as wonderful of a dad as I thought he would be. He loves being with Quinn. He can spend hours staring at him, and he is getting the hang of holding him. I don't think Dave had really ever held a baby till his own! He bounces him in the middle of the night, and changes him for me so I can get a few more seconds of sleep. He makes me tea and fills up my water.. He doesn't cook for me yet, but hey...nobody is perfect. =)
We had some trouble getting enough breastmilk from my breasts for Quinn. (I had a breast reduction in my early 20's) I tried really hard, and took everything the midwife's recommended, but he wasn't gaining weight the way he should've been. Therefore we had to start supplementing. It was a hard thing to hear, and hard on the ego, but whatever makes this baby thrive...I now breastfeed him everytime he is hungry (about every hour and a half) and then after he pulls away, I give him about 2 ounces of formula. He is gaining weight now, and we are all adjusting. Thank goodness he still takes me as well as the bottle. The good part about this is that Dave can be apart of the feeding and it's helping thier bond that much more. The only time I don't give him a little "extra" is at night.
Well, we going to eat dinner and start our nightly routine...bedtime for us all these days is about 8:30p. It's a different life, but the most incredible journey I've ever been on. It's far from blissful everyday, but it's raw and real and filled with such adventure and love.
Goodnight from the Hall's and enjoy the pics below!!
Till we meet again...